You Can't Always Get What You Want

That was the last song I sang at karaoke when it was at The Sinclair. Apparently it was streamed and some of my friends actually saw me singing this song. I love The Rolling Stones. And this song was played on the organ in that awful Baby Boomer movie The Big Chill. You know, the one where all the people get together about 10 years after school and mope and groan about the trials of adulthood and listen to old music that reminds them of their youth and there's always someone who's fucked up on drugs, and someone who's kinda famous, and the "perfect" couple that has problems, and the drug addict... you know what I'm talking about.

But it's true. You can't always get what you want, but you find sometimes you get what you need. My last post was a little bitchy. But I just have so many friends who feel like their entitled to so much more than what they have in life and don't appreciate the things they already have and take forgranted that they really have it a lot better than most other people and that there's barely anything really that guarantees you're always going to be in the position you're in currently. Sometimes it gets better and sometimes it gets worse.

I'm guilty of it myself. I think I have problems and then I see that a lot of other people do, too. But it's apples and oranges. You can't compare your hardships with others' because of all the variables that make that particular position difficult to that individual.

I used to think I had it all and no harm could come to me. I had a fiancee, I could easily get a job, I had "friends" and I was happy just pegging myself in a not so comfortable hole and just letting the status quo be. And then I got too comfortable. So I took all of that for granted and stopped appreciating it. And that's when the floor fell from under me. Lost the good jobs, lost the fiancee, my fair-weather friends flew the coop, and my little hole of comfort just spat me out like a piece of bitter fruit.

And now that some time has passed, I'm so thankful I went through that miserable time. It taught me to appreciate and be thankful for all the small things. It helped me learn more about myself. It made me realize that I'm a lot stronger than I had ever needed to be in the past. I think the biggest thing I learned is that it's okay to fall, so long as you don't just lay on the ground and let life run you over. You have to pick yourself up, no matter how bruised and battered you feel... Because it does get better eventually. Don't just be complacent and accept that your life may suck for a bit. If it sucks, then change it up and make it better. Not for anyone else, but for yourself. Because no one's going to do it for you.

People in my generation kind of disgust me. Some of us think we're so entittled because we did what we thought were supposed to be the right things and stuff isn't going the way we want it to. We're adults now. You do the right things because they're the right things to do. Not because you're supposed to be "rewarded". Because I hate to say it, but doing the good deed in and of itself is the reward. Shitty things happen to good people. You just have to make the most of it. It might not be exactly what you wanted to happen or it may not happen exactly as you wished it would, but whatever is meant to happen happens eventually. You can't just give up. And you can't just blindly make the same mistakes over and over again.

I'm done being insane. And I'm done enabling others to be insane too. I'm sick and tired of people who say one thing, but expect another. Expectation is the root of all heartache. If you're doing something stupid, I'm gonna call you on it. I'm not gonna tiptoe dance around everyone. It doesn't fix anything. I just makes small issues into bigger ones.