Well, today is another day of chaos and bedlam as far as work goes. We're setting history as the first outbound virtual-agents. Not the first time I've done something like this, believe it or not. I used to work at an answering service where we had to be in a "virtual doctor's office" where people in Maryland would be calling their doctor a mile up the road and they'd be routed to some call center down here in FL. We even had to wear scrubs so it would feel more genuine which just made it more B.S. than anything.
This gig, we call and say we're calling on behalf of so-and-so from the corporate contact center, but they just recently implemented a new system that enables remote dialing and it looks like we're calling from the actual office so that makes it a lot easier. Some of the agents are easy to deal with, but others are a bit more difficult. My experience has been fairly pleasant.
Life seems to be pretty good these days. I'm so glad that my life hasn't been too chaotic and hectic. I have confidence and better self-esteem than I've had in years. I have men who desire me. Plural. I look better than I have in 5 years. I'm finally learning to accept and love myself. I'm doing things to make myself happy rather than putting other people's happiness ahead of my own. And I've noticed that people are feeding off my good vibe and treating me with more respect.
I'll admit I do miss being in love. But being on my own has helped me regain my self-worth and my self-respect. It's helped me learn I don't need anyone else's validation or approval so long as I don't get all crazy and disrespectful towards others. I just need to focus on my own positivity and be mindful that you reap just what you sow.
Ripple was all saying these things, but it was all lip-service. She has no concept of anything outside her vapid head. I was trying to tell her about the things that I've learned during my imposed isolation and meditation. She wasn't heeding or paying attention to any of it. She just kept parroting that she had learned all of these things, but truth be told, she's more shallow than a tide pool.
I have this sick passive aggressive game I play with myself. It's called "Spot Ludwig". I go to the shandwich shop right next to where he works and simultaneously hope he sees me and hope he doesn't. I'm such a sick sad person. One day I'll be okay...
One day. But I'm almost there :)
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