Gah... I have this weird feeling in my tummy. It's almost the time of year that I dread and love simultaneously. I mean, if we go by the weather, then it's here already... Spring. I love it. But it's when my heart gets all fluttery and lovey.
I've been seeing someone for almost a year now. It's just sex. But everyone keeps telling me I'm not a "just sex" kind of girl. M-er F-ers, if you know anything about me, you know not to pidgeonhole me. Everything else is allowable. But not that.
I like the dude. I really do. But he has his baggage. I have mine. We've both been burned in the past. It's fun. But I always have a way of making a friends with benefits thing deeper than it needs to be. It's not my intention. But either my idiotic emotions get involved or the dude apparently is retarded enough to care about me. Or there's a fucked up blend of both. I'm not letting Cupid shoot his arrows at me this time. Last time, I got them right in the f*cking kneecaps.
Enough about that. I made a killing at goodwill. Got a new purse, a belt, a few shirts and a skirt. And a cute little case for my glasses. And of course, Dirty Diana by MJ was playing on my strut home. I felt like a total badass. Dad told me he'd help me with COBRA, but I still owe for what I borrowed in between jobs. Which is awesome. I can manage that on the next check which won't be missing two days.
Oh lordy. I knew someone was going to defriend me after Friday. The person who did is always refriending and defriending me since I've known him. It's not a big deal. But don't hug me goodbye, tell me we're gonna hang out, and then just run off and defriend me sneakily. I'm trying to avoid that kind of stuff. If you have a problem, be up front. Don't be phony.
I hope some of my friends from the farm stay in touch. Even if it's just on fb. I'm not gonna be torn apart if they don't. I don't have to deal with any of them unless they want to hang out. I don't turn away someone who wants to be my friend. But I'm not gonna beg people to be my friend either. You either like me or you don't. I can be crude and insensitive sometimes. I'm just as human as you are. I'm done people pleasing. I was a bit disorganized Friday night. I wasn't expecting half of the team from quote and bind to be there.
I don't mean to be negative, but yes... I know there were some people there to see what new curve this train hit and how hard it will wreck. It's okay. I prolly would have done the same thing maybe. But I'm happy and stable. I'm sorry that isn't enough to accomodate others, but it's good enough for me. And really, that's all I am asking for. I hope whoever wants to talk to other people and tell them my business does. You must be really bored if I'm the hot topic of discussion. I mean, come on. Really. I'll make a list for everyone if it's the case.
Dee's current status (the abridged version):
1.) She has a job.
2.) She dresses up nicely instead of a 14 year old boy in a Goonies shirt. (I still have the truffle shuffle one though.)
3.) She's doing the right things to accomodate her health in all aspects.
4.) She has more piercings. (for the pre-farmers)
5.) She's kinda sorta involved with someone, but they weren't there.
6.) She's gained about 5-10 pounds.
7.) She's not quite a hot mess, but she's still a bit disorganized. So we'll say she's a warm mess.
If I left anyone out and you want more details, you have to ask me yourself. There are no hidden meanings or deceptions in that information. I'm sure you know where to find me or how to find me. And if those answers satiate your curiosity, well, I'm glad that I could accomodate. Now, please politely go and eff off. Thank you for your time. Now I'm going to go and relax and listen to some music.
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